Top Ten Reasons That Having Reverse-Insomnia and Being Up at 4:30 a.m. Is Not So Bad:

10. First in line for the blender
9. IMing my 75-year-old father—he’s up too!
8. Letting the newspaper boy know we’re watching
7. First in line for up-to-date news from the EU and the current state of the yen
6. Work . . . unfortunately
5. Letting the neighbor walking her dog that sh_ts on our flowers know we’re watching
4. Knowing the baby won’t be up for another three hours
3. First in line for wordherding!
2. Another smoothie at 10:30
And the number one reason that Having Reverse-Insomnia and Being Up at 4:30 a.m. Is Not So Bad:
1. Nap at 11*
*Note to self: the idea that you’ll be able to take a nap at 11 is your waking mind dreaming . . .

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