@BaronessElsa

– it was quite a sum – 10-000 marks – and Mr. Felix had given it her.

(I didn’t care to listen) “for the sake of the girl to save the brother – or the sake of the “circle” –

This girl had come to him – begging money for her brothers* embezzlement – I knew – it was talked about such affairs at that time –

It was merely logic of life’s chemistry. He needed me as antidote.

Of course – it was – but it was no disgrace – I feel today – it was – contrary – triumph!

and to lose that feeling of being good enough maybe – as plaster for him – for this girl had wounded his masculine vanity!

I felt an over powering contempt for this girl and at – least no sane pride and satisfaction to have him after – all in the “lucky end” –

The thing still ranked nevertheless. But I couldn’t get him again to talk of it – very cleverly.

a sable cloud fought off victoriously by the sun of his hair and strength and person – by his compeling personality.

I breathed deeply – at – last – all was well – my pride was saved – the spell was broken –